Relations-Own & be Owned
I dropped my kid on the school bus and went for my driving lessons. Coincidently while I was driving, her bus passed on before us and she saw me from window. At that same moment I too caught her glimpse. She was super happy and so was I. That one look, the glee and spark in her eyes made my day. On my way back I was wondering, out of so many children on the bus how I caught only her view. I concluded that since I have given her birth, this might be happening that we both long and bond strongly.
A few days later I happened to meet a friend .She has a son and a daughter. Son is quite elder to daughter .I observed that the daughter was so attached to her parents and so caring about them. A little kid barely of 4 years was strikingly very fond of her mother and vice versa. This is a natural normal phenomenon. But to my pleasant surprise, she happened to be an adopted daughter. My friend and her hubby had mutually decided to adopt a girl after birth of son. Their bonding was magical and so natural. Seeing their bond, their warmth my first conclusion of birth connection seemed to fade. I realised that biological birth builds up a natural bond but the bond of love is more important. The feeling of compassion and the feeling of being looked after is equally rewarding. Children don’t only turn to us because of birth but because of the love, warmth and affection. I got to see real life example from so near which was quite an eye opener. There is no discrimination among her kids. Brother has accepted his sister whole heartedly in return of abundance of love and affection. Love is one true emotion and essence of all relations.
Nearly twenty years have passed after I left my school. Internet was not much used at that time and mobiles were also not there. I happen to visit my hometown also occasionally. So rarely got a chance to go to school or catch up with my teachers. But thanks to social networking sites now I have found many of my childhood teachers. We are in constant communication now. I have realised that they still have the same warmth and affection which we used to experience at school. School teachers are just like our mothers. They used to discipline us but never hurt us. They had some special techniques of instilling fear for wrong along with loads of love and affection. Whenever we remember old days we only remember how safe, secured and happy we used to be at our schools. We don’t have any bitter memories of punishments and strict discipline. We remember how they used to shout and punish us but we miss more the happy times and the ways in which they inculcated values in us. What is amusing is so hundreds of students pass from institution but teachers remember and love them all. I feel teachers own all their students. They accept them. This ownership feeling is magical. Every teacher-student relation is different. Every student is unique. But once the teacher owns them, students naturally get attracted because of the warmth, the knowledge and the sense of belonging. Ownership is definitely foundation of any lasting connection.
The above principle holds equally true in respect of Supreme Power. I have limited knowledge of spirituality and philosophy. My grandmother has been following an institution over ages. Several times we engaged in discussion over need of Spiritual Guru. Supreme power is invisible but can only be felt. Having a Spiritual Guru guides us to feel and to experience this power consciously. Spiritual guru gives a form to this power. Spiritual Guru own their disciples. They take the responsibility of guiding their followers on the path of life. They try to enlighten disciples by imparting knowledge, values and making them understand real crux of life. Those who are initiated by such spiritual gurus agree that they feel a support a pillar of strength, they get direction in life and they get to know important philosophy from such gurus. They get to understand the real meaning of happiness and love and rise above temporary emotional turbulence in life. Just like mother, the Guru owns disciples. In crowd how the mother observes the kid, same way in life’s journey guru observes the disciple.
Mother, guardian, Teacher, Guru or Supreme Power whatever may be the name, the essence of all bonding is the underlying feeling of ownership. Once we own and accept someone, we naturally start loving and caring about them. Ignoring and accepting faults, shortcomings become easy. We worship the Creator because we know he is there unconditionally always to take our responsibility, to rectify and to guide us. Person who is owned starts feeling sense of warmth and emotional security when there is acceptance and openness. Children can accept their faults, their misdeeds before mother because of surety of acceptance and there is no fear of dejection .Motherly love is purest form because it is selfless and without any expectation. It is non judgemental. Candid conversation is possible between two individuals only when there is such strong bonding.
We human beings cannot sustain alone in life’s journey. Solitude is good occasionally. But we need companions and we need guardians. We human beings have a natural tendency to turn upto those who give us love and who care about us. Relations are not built by blood but by acceptance and altruistic love. This is true for any kind of humane association. The same philosophy works for any kind of relation whether for friends, for lovers or for couples.
To own and be owned is the key to experience ultimate feeling of unconditional love and strength in life’s journey.
