Happiness in Belief

Every year all festivals like Karwachauth, Vatpornima, Teej are celebrated with great pomp and joy in our society. Mehendi, Music, dance and so on. All ladies come together to celebrate the festivals in best of their attires and have loads of fun together along with the pooja. The main purpose of pooja as per religious belief is safety and security of husbands. Simultaneously women get a chance to indulge in varied activities.

In all these female centric festivals like Teej, Gangaur, Karwachauth ,Vatpornima, Hartalika, girls or women are expected to fast and follow all traditions. In most of these festivals working women or homemakers fast throughout the day, perform pooja, cook for family and then late night break their fasts.

Recently I read a post in which the writer was criticising all these customs as being a reflection of gender discrimination in Indian Society. Her point was in all festivals girls are expected to fast, take extra efforts, make all sacrifices and follow all rituals. This according to her was truly disgusting when girls today are so empowered and equality has been proved.

I am a religious person but frankly I have never observed any fasts or rigid norms. When I read about her opinion I was little perturbed. I have always believed that religion is very personal thing and individualistic too. As per my observation and study there is no doubt that majority of the festivals celebrated in India are female centric.But we need to see the context and history before being judgemental.

In earlier days in India, women were confined to their homes. Men went outside for work. Women were not allowed to go outside their houses except for religious or family reasons. I guess these festivals gave a valid reason for all women to come together and spend some good time together.

All festivals have some religious as well as in many, scientific importance too. Most of these rituals are designed keeping weather, surroundings and general wellbeing into consideration. In absence of proper education and understanding, the logic and importance was not well explained and was passed on through generations by way of following without questioning. The traditions and rituals were followed blindly without any doubts. Fear was instilled that if not followed these can bring hardships or danger. The logic behind such fear was that mass in general will do it without any disturbance in society. Women got a chance to visit family and friends because of these festivities. They got a chance to pamper themselves. During these festivals they played various games, indulged in dance and music also. So it was a source of entertainment and joy.

Fasting was an integral part of many festivities but there was no much fuss since they were in households and were not required to go out for work. Another related issue is of sitting aside in menstruation in anything related to rituals and festivals. This practice is still followed in many households. In earlier days there were joint families. Work could be shared by women of house and a woman could comfortably afford to sit aside and take rest. Proper hygiene and sanitation means were limited. So it was anyways favourable for lady in menstruation to stay away from all to avoid embarrassment and exertion. In most of the temples women are not allowed to enter during menstruation. I read a theory according to which it is believed that during menstruation, women are constantly dissipating energy from their bodies. Most religious chants are meant to balance out the energies in our body. However, this would interfere with the natural losing of energy that must happen in menstruating women to prevent excessive energy build-up. Hence, menstruating women are told to keep away during such occasions, so that their natural processes are not tampered with. The other reason I came across was that menstruating women become open to receiving and absorbing energy during this time. This means, they can easily absorb other’s energies, including negative energies. Hence, they are asked to stay away from crowds and gatherings.

In today’s context if we see majority of the women are no longer confined to homes. A working women or homemaker, both are required to go out for various household and professional tasks. Education has made them independent and socially active too.Better and convenient options of sanitization are available. Modern and progressive India has witnessed a remarkable change in mentality of society. The customs and traditions are no longer required to be followed blindly and out of fear.

I feel it is high time for women of our era to understand the logic behind these festivities,rituals and enjoy them. There should be no compulsion and rigidity to do or not to do anything. It is my observation that most of the fear and rigidity is instilled my senior women in house. Their fear of something bad will happen is passed on. But we as educated generation can bring about a change. Festivals add colour to our lives. They reflect true essence of India. They add excitement, happiness and bonding. We all are so packed in our day to day routine lives. These events can be used as great stress busters.The purpose should no longer be limited to safety and security of men of household.We can use these events to pray and make some resolutions for healthy and happy wellbeing of all in households.

Fasting if practiced properly is a means of detoxification. Fasting and cooking on such festivals can be made optional. So many options of homemade food are available. We can explore them or men of house can take up this responsibility on such occasions. We need not keep these festivals female centric. New generation of boys and men can be encouraged to participate and indulge in all festivities with women. Happiness is the core factor which needs to be kept in mind while doing anything.

Religion should be an individualistic thing. It is between the individual and supreme power. The mode of connection with supreme power is every individual's own choice. We all need to believe that the Power which has created us can never intend anything bad for us. Customs and rituals should be looked as source of vibrant positive energies. If women feel they are exploited they may not follow these rituals.

I strongly feel the positivity and cleansing of our surroundings and minds through these festivities is more important than the rituals and customs. If there is no enforcement and fear of implications these rituals and customs can be followed with proper understanding and without stress. If small changes are made, flexibility is offered and if there is equal participation there will be no discussion about gender discrimination.

Friends what is important is understanding and believing what we do. We can derive happiness only when we have strong belief in our thought process and actions.

It is rightly said by Joseph Prince

“God doesn't want us to have rigid rituals with Him. In the new covenant, He is more interested in having a relationship with us”.