Identity
"Identity”, this 8-letter word becomes our world once we start understanding things in life. I was discussing with a client regarding identity proof. My daughter instantly asked me what is her identity proof. Such a simple and straightforward question. But is the answer so simple? For time being I replied it is her passport. But in reality, is it identity proof? And what does identity actually mean?
A recent discussion with some of my friends highlighted the notion that our earning, our profession, our career defines our identity. I have always felt earning capacity can give financial independence but not identity. If that was the case higher posts, flourishing business would make up identity. Isn’t such identity temporary? If business gets closed or one is sacked,one will lose identity. Then can we say posts or jobs make our identity?
We human beings as social animals always crave for recognition. We need someone to acknowledge our presence, to recognise our existence. Is this recognition our identity?
In some instances, people who don't get this recognition develop a complex. They start feeling low about themselves and crave for attention every now and then. I have seen many times people going out of way or putting stupendous efforts just to gain some appreciation and recognition in eyes of people around. Is identity created in such a manner perpetual?
Being a rank holder till CA entrance, I started feeling indirect pressure to perform well in each and every exam. People around would feel I have no stress to pass any exams and assumed I would pass with flying colours and have a flourishing career. Resultant during CA final course, I couldn't dare to attempt exam for the fear of failure. I was ready to leave exam but not ready to fail. It took a lot of motivation and persuasion from my parents to prepare myself for appearing in the exams. Later when I decided not to pursue corporate career everyone around including close relatives started questioning and wondering why I was not doing justice to my professional degree.
Society always tries to put pressure on us, directly or indirectly to behave in certain way or to achieve certain defined goals in life. If we behave in certain manner we are assumed to be well settled in life and perhaps happy too. In adhering to these social expectations our individual choices, preferences start taking a backseat and we start succumbing to societal pressures on a regular basis. Are we as individuals really bound to adhere to norms? Can a person not study just because he or she is interested in studies? Can a person not pursue a work just because he or she loves it? Money is que essential for existence. But how much and earned through what way should be individual choice.
What if a person decides not to marry or not to have kids? Do earning, marital status, kids define our identity?
My grandmother was extremely hardworking,a loving soul and a wonderful cook. She was extremely spiritual. She believed in seva as a form of worship and for years together cooked and served monks of mission as and when possible. She made beautiful garlands from rare flowers which she specially plucked going to different places in early morning. I remember her fingers getting burnt while preparing ghee-soaked wicks for mission. But she did this without fail and with so much love and affection. Her devotion became her identity.
Recently came across a finance professional and passionate runner, who ran blind folded twice to promote blood donation. In this case will his feat define his identity or his income?
One of my friends holding top post in MNC is extremely caring and helping.He makes sure that people around him at his workplace and at home are comfortable.He takes extra efforts despite his hectic work schedules to build and maintain relations with friends and family.This nature has made him favourite of many in family and at workplace.This warmth has become his identity.
I feel our character which is unique, define our identity. We all are blessed by Almighty with qualities and special talents. We need to take special efforts to understand, explore and develop these qualities to build up our identity. What we do to make our souls happy define our identity. Such work is always fulfilling and if efforts are channelized in perfect manner such activity can help us to earn livelihood too.
Identity is perpetual, materialistic achievements are temporary and superficial. When we give attention to our inherent characteristics we can excel. Artists, entrepreneurs, leaders, orators all have explored and worked upon their strengths to achieve what they are meant to in life. When our profession is aligned to our basic nature, we naturally tend to gain recognition.
Friends, life is about exploring purpose of our existence and not fulfilling social expectations alone. There is no harm in enjoying materialistic pleasures as fruits of our efforts but we should never get attached to those pleasures. Our happiness, our awareness of existence can't be linked to these pleasures.It's social recognition that takes a toll on real identity most of the time.What is needed from an individual is to focus on one's natural strength and what is needed from society is to recognise an individual as who,he or she is without putting labels of financial or social standing.That way a perpetual identity can be built and pave the way for happy and fulfilling life.
